Kamis, 10 Februari 2011

Love : Tips On How To Cope When A Relationship Ends

I am sure that we have all been through the nightmare of been dumped by our boyfriend or girlfriend. At times it is something that we were expecting, however more often than not it comes as a big shock. In this situation it is very hard to take, and in this article I give free tips on how to cope in this situation.

I have had a number of girlfriends, most of whom have decided to end the relationship. As a teenager even though it wounded my pride, I have to say that it did not really bother me. I at thatstage had never met anyone who really lets say, did it for me. In fact most of these girls/women were quite annoying. They were either:

Too clingy and wanted to see me everyday, wanted me to call them seemingly every hour and became upset when I wanted to see my friends.

A crier, what I mean by that is that they would cry over the smallest things and were basically too emotional.

The jealous type. I am not one to cheat, however these type of girls would always be accusing me of seeing or fancying somebody else.

Untrustworthy. These are girls who I just knew were only interested in playing the field and who were basically only worth dating for a bit of fun.


I then met when I was around twenty-one a girl who seemed too good to be true. She was none of the above and we got on so well it was scary. 

All of my life, I had had a dream to live by the coast as I love the sea. I was from a big city and was not particularly happy living in this fast pace of life. I yearned for a quite and tranquil existence.

After around two years of being with this new girlfriend, we decided that we would live together and that we would make my dream move. I was very happy and we moved to the southwest coast of England to the county of Devon.

I was very happy in my new home but my girlfriend soon became homesick. She missed her friends, parents and the family pets. We were now seeing each other basically all day everyday, where we had only spent around four nights a week together when we had lived in the city. We did not know anyone who lived in Devon and things began to become strained. 

My girlfriend was now becoming quite moody and often stated that she wanted to move back. I certainly did not want to and hoped that she would soon grow to love Devon, as I did, and that she would meet new friends. I was still very happy to live with her and felt sure that it was just teething pains.

One day I arrived back at the bungalow where we lived, after doing some food shopping. I opened the door which to my surprise had been locked. Her car was not there and I wondered where she may have gone to. As I entered the living room, to my horror I found that many things were no longer there. Pictures I had purchased, the dvd player, the stereo and many ornaments had been taken. I looked around the rest of the bungalow and found many other items also missing.


It suddenly dawned on me that she had left me, and also taken as you have read a lot of stuff. I did not care about any of the items but was gutted that she had obviously dumped me. I was sat on a chair and could not stop crying.

I then decided to phone her but half way through dialing the number I stopped myself. I sat down and thought about what I may have done wrong. I could not think of anything major, I had not hit her, I had not cheated on her, the only thing I could think of is that I had not agreed to move back to the city with her.

I decided not to call her and started to think about all of the things I disliked about her, for example her mood swings. There were to be no more tears and instead I was going to celebrate being single by drinking a few beers and by ordering a pizza. She hated me drinking beer, but now I could.

I thought in a positive way about the future and was determined to stick it out in Devon. I will meet somebody else I thought to myself.

It was not easy to think in this way and I did miss her, I had after all dated her for a long time. She did not seem to miss me however as she did not phone me once to see how I was. This made me angry and actually made me think that I could probably do better. How would she have reacted if I had done something wrong, if this is how she is going to react when I haven't, I thought to myself. I would have at least thought she could have given me an ultimatem, for example I will leave you if you do not move back with me. Problem is what would I have done then.

As luck has it, I actually met my present fiancee the day after this all happened. We now have a child together and I could not be happier.

In conclusion, always think in a positive way, if you have done in your own mind nothing wrong, there is nothing to worry about. The person who has dumped you is probably not worth it anyway as the whole ethos of a proper relationship, is about support and about sticking together through the good times and the bad. If they are going to walk at the first sign of trouble they are probably not the person you thought they were. 

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